Man I have never felt more like having a multiple personality then ever after reading Our Time. Wideman leaps from different perspectives with the ease of a fawn frolicking in a meadow. It is a strange feeling, like in The Fly when the dude swaps heads with the fly so that his body becomes that of the fly , while the fly’s body becomes human. I’m talking about the original fly mind you, not the Jeff Goldblum remake (wasn’t good, wasn’t bad just Jeff Goldblum) where the lady walks into the lab and pulls the cloth of the body to reveal a ginormous fly head and then loses it and lets out that blood curdling shriek.
I also have to admit that writing this way is almost a kind of genius. Especially the parts where he is writing his brothers perspective right down to the way he feels “Choked up by the way he gets in Hospitals. Hospital smell and quiet, the bare halls and bare floors, the echoes, something about all that he can’t name, wouldn’t try to name, rises in him and chills him. Like his teeth are chattering the whole time he’s in the hospital.” It’s like writing in the fourth dimension. It even has it’s own space and time…weird I know.
Another thing is the impossibility of writing in another persons perspective. “ Do I write to escape, to make a fiction of my life? If I can’t be trusted with the story of my own life, how could I ask my brother to trust me with his?” For me this is easy, because as I have said too many time before, I have the unique ability to remove myself from the picture. I am as invisible as the air. However for someone who hasn’t been shown or that has stumbled across this ability then it would be tantamount to climbing Everest the day after you first conceived of doing it. With now practice or preparation you’d be setting yourself up for disaster.
Friday, November 23, 2007
Renato Rosaldo
Holy crap, they’re real! I can’t believe that somehow people out there really hunt people’s heads! Although I must admit the purpose behind it now illuminates at least the reason why this task is done. First I myself need to rid myself of the world that is forced upon me. I am an American citizen, and I have strong moral values. (none of which include headhunting…yet…just kidding)
Rosaldo first could not imagine how grief could equate to anger. It is clear that his picture of grief, like most of the “civilized world” equates to sadness. Now for some reason I was not surprised at this. My own bias is that of my upbringing. The things I see in this world are often on a powerful and emotional level, never do I perceive things at face value…unless the value is of course only found on the face…(I dare you to tell me what you think that means!) I found that by leaving yourself susceptible to the emotion that an experience brings about it is far easier to catch a glimpse the light at the end of the tunnel.
I also advocate experience. Although one would have to be Ilongot to fully comprehend the experience, because they are raised with the idea that taking a persons head gives them a place to “Carry his anger.” Rosaldo himself says “Only after being repositioned through a devastating loss of my own could I better grasp that Ilongot older men mean precisely what they say when they describe the anger in bereavement as the source of their desire to cut off human heads.” I agree absolutely with this.
As I think back to what grief means, I am reminded of the last three years. 2005, 2006, and 2007. In each of these years someone I know and or care about has committed suicide. This is particularly bad in that they have all done it in the same way and while in the presence of someone they supposedly care about. All three of them were men, and all three of them were either on the phone with ,or in the room with their girlfriends. I do not mean to draw any connections or inferences to the meaning of or between these happenings apart from the fact that I have personally known all of them. It hurts to see another year go by knowing that one more of your friends or a relative has taken their life and there was nothing you could do. Helplessness turns to despair, and despair turns to anger. Anger causes many things but is definitely in the process of grieving.
Here in America we place our anger in a casket and bury it with our loved ones. Grief is three days off from work where how you feel means nothing on the annual report.
I understand completely why the Ilongot cut heads off…it gives them something to do, rather than to sit back biting the bullet wishing it was you that had died instead.
Rosaldo first could not imagine how grief could equate to anger. It is clear that his picture of grief, like most of the “civilized world” equates to sadness. Now for some reason I was not surprised at this. My own bias is that of my upbringing. The things I see in this world are often on a powerful and emotional level, never do I perceive things at face value…unless the value is of course only found on the face…(I dare you to tell me what you think that means!) I found that by leaving yourself susceptible to the emotion that an experience brings about it is far easier to catch a glimpse the light at the end of the tunnel.
I also advocate experience. Although one would have to be Ilongot to fully comprehend the experience, because they are raised with the idea that taking a persons head gives them a place to “Carry his anger.” Rosaldo himself says “Only after being repositioned through a devastating loss of my own could I better grasp that Ilongot older men mean precisely what they say when they describe the anger in bereavement as the source of their desire to cut off human heads.” I agree absolutely with this.
As I think back to what grief means, I am reminded of the last three years. 2005, 2006, and 2007. In each of these years someone I know and or care about has committed suicide. This is particularly bad in that they have all done it in the same way and while in the presence of someone they supposedly care about. All three of them were men, and all three of them were either on the phone with ,or in the room with their girlfriends. I do not mean to draw any connections or inferences to the meaning of or between these happenings apart from the fact that I have personally known all of them. It hurts to see another year go by knowing that one more of your friends or a relative has taken their life and there was nothing you could do. Helplessness turns to despair, and despair turns to anger. Anger causes many things but is definitely in the process of grieving.
Here in America we place our anger in a casket and bury it with our loved ones. Grief is three days off from work where how you feel means nothing on the annual report.
I understand completely why the Ilongot cut heads off…it gives them something to do, rather than to sit back biting the bullet wishing it was you that had died instead.
Walker Percy
This one was a difficult read for me. I felt like the obvious was being over explained. In way Percy is directly proving what Nietzsche was talking about in On Truth and Lies in the Nonmoral sense. Everyone has a human brain. The “built in” mechanisms of our brain allow us to develop a scaffolding or web work of expectations based on our experiences. This allows us to fit comfortably inside this world we have created within our own perspectives.
Percy goes on to say in his example of the tourists in Mexico who stumble upon an unknown village by accident. They immediately think of their friend the Ethnologist. In order to get the feeling that their experience was real and that they had seen the “it” that makes seeing Mexico worthwhile, they sought out the perspective of an expert who would know for sure. “\They wanted him, not to share their experience, but to certify their experience as genuine.” So in other words they wanted to say “I told you so.”
I find this unsettling. As from my perspective, as I have undoubtedly spoken about before, I have the unique ability to remove myself from the picture and to see things in a “natural” light so to speak. I do not understand the concept of living up to expectation as I do not hold any other than to myself to do the best I can. I see things the way they are by leaving myself vulnerable. I do not feel the need to explain or to show off my understanding of what is to someone else, therefore the translation of emotion into words comes direct like a firing synapse within my brain.
I will admit, because I am human, that sometimes I do feel the need for acceptance. That is to say that they way I see things is in fact “the” way to see them. However that is a trap to easy to fall into. I tell myself that this is of course ONE way to see it, and that there are about…h lets say six billion or so ways of seeing it.
Percy goes on to say in his example of the tourists in Mexico who stumble upon an unknown village by accident. They immediately think of their friend the Ethnologist. In order to get the feeling that their experience was real and that they had seen the “it” that makes seeing Mexico worthwhile, they sought out the perspective of an expert who would know for sure. “\They wanted him, not to share their experience, but to certify their experience as genuine.” So in other words they wanted to say “I told you so.”
I find this unsettling. As from my perspective, as I have undoubtedly spoken about before, I have the unique ability to remove myself from the picture and to see things in a “natural” light so to speak. I do not understand the concept of living up to expectation as I do not hold any other than to myself to do the best I can. I see things the way they are by leaving myself vulnerable. I do not feel the need to explain or to show off my understanding of what is to someone else, therefore the translation of emotion into words comes direct like a firing synapse within my brain.
I will admit, because I am human, that sometimes I do feel the need for acceptance. That is to say that they way I see things is in fact “the” way to see them. However that is a trap to easy to fall into. I tell myself that this is of course ONE way to see it, and that there are about…h lets say six billion or so ways of seeing it.
Jane Tompkins
I feel like Charlie Brown…Good Grief. I don’t think anyone will ever truly understand the topic of White-Indian relations. It is of course the most least understood, and the most complex of human cultural relationships, but for gods sake just open your eyes and let the truth fill them. Now let me explain myself for a moment. I know that Tompkins is only trying to illustrate the difficulty in trying to illuminate the truth in a history. I know that she has done monumental amounts of research, as have the authors/ historians she had read and referred to. However the unfortunate side effect to all that research is the knots you will undoubtedly tie in the sequence of events. There are just too many sides of the story to tell. There is a different account of events for every person who either lived it, recorded, heard, sought, or pondered upon it.
There is a way to untie those knots and to weed out some semblance of truth. It is to divert attention from individual accounts and to focus upon human character. It is a known fact that a story will change most every time it is told and retold over and over. Things will be added or cut our, embellished or diminished, and this is all done in order to make the person hearing/reading it, believe a certain perspective to be more credible than another. It is a known fact that humans are capable of deception and manipulation. Taking these things into account, one can reasonably infer only from the facts, and not by the suppositions of another human being.
Looking back to Limerick we see that the lives of Whites and Indians are so vastly intertwined that in reality it was never a conquest but a symbiosis in which one side gained more than the other. Remember how terribly ironic it was to read how an Indian killed a white man with a manufactured firearm? That’s what I’m trying to say, that is what Pratt was saying in Art of the Contact Zones. Whenever a human person comes in contact with another, they will always impact one another. They will share in their victories and their defeats and they will argue and fight like any other human being would. Ultimately both sides are human and in the ebb and flow of time things changed in the way of the white man…that’ll last only until the next “White Man”
There is a way to untie those knots and to weed out some semblance of truth. It is to divert attention from individual accounts and to focus upon human character. It is a known fact that a story will change most every time it is told and retold over and over. Things will be added or cut our, embellished or diminished, and this is all done in order to make the person hearing/reading it, believe a certain perspective to be more credible than another. It is a known fact that humans are capable of deception and manipulation. Taking these things into account, one can reasonably infer only from the facts, and not by the suppositions of another human being.
Looking back to Limerick we see that the lives of Whites and Indians are so vastly intertwined that in reality it was never a conquest but a symbiosis in which one side gained more than the other. Remember how terribly ironic it was to read how an Indian killed a white man with a manufactured firearm? That’s what I’m trying to say, that is what Pratt was saying in Art of the Contact Zones. Whenever a human person comes in contact with another, they will always impact one another. They will share in their victories and their defeats and they will argue and fight like any other human being would. Ultimately both sides are human and in the ebb and flow of time things changed in the way of the white man…that’ll last only until the next “White Man”
Mary Louis Pratt
Arts of the Contact Zone was only slightly interesting to me. It is a part of a group of readings that I suppose are used to enlighten the mind to possibilities that most people never consider. That the things they see and hear require more speculation and diligence then when they are first experienced. Don’t take things at face value if you will. Pratts addition to this is directly the language and culture barriers that prevent proper communication.
A contact Zone to Pratt is anywhere two different peoples meet each other. She alludes to the impossibility to write about another culture objectively because of humanity. Because both are human they always impact one another in one way or another. Generally in superiority and inferiority complexes. Pratt uses the example of the Spanish conquest over the Incas. She is using a text written by Guaman Poma to explore this barrier.
Pratt is quick to remind us that the Incan had no system of writing. The letter was written by adapting the “representational repertoire of the invaders.” This is called transculturation. The Incans never had this system before, but found it useful to express their values which could not have been done before.
A contact Zone to Pratt is anywhere two different peoples meet each other. She alludes to the impossibility to write about another culture objectively because of humanity. Because both are human they always impact one another in one way or another. Generally in superiority and inferiority complexes. Pratt uses the example of the Spanish conquest over the Incas. She is using a text written by Guaman Poma to explore this barrier.
Pratt is quick to remind us that the Incan had no system of writing. The letter was written by adapting the “representational repertoire of the invaders.” This is called transculturation. The Incans never had this system before, but found it useful to express their values which could not have been done before.
Nietzsche
Truth. I have spent a good part of my life searching for truth in various forms. An accident of my upbringing first caused me to question not religion, but the people who follow it. Truth became a buried treasure with no map. However this is a little more complex an issue than Nietzsche writes about, if you can believe that, in Truth and Lies in a Nonmoral sense.
First lets look at the word Nonmoral so that we can determine just what Nietzsche is talking about. Nonmoral is classified by philosophers as being absent from moral behavior, that is to say they have no impact of acting in a good or in a less desirable way. That means that the kind of truth he is describing here is universal. It is accepted everywhere by everyone that has the ability to comprehend, and in fact is self-sufficient apart from mankind. Meaning oxygen is the same to fish who takes it from the water, as to a man who breathes it upon land. That is a universal truth.
Nietzsche is also questioning where the drive to find the truth came from. He brings this up because of two things.
One is Intellect. It is the tool given to us by nature to help us survive. Homonids are very fragile creatures with no sharp teeth, claws, or fangs to protect it. We have a brain that can comprehend, compute, and reason. That is our weapon in this world. “For this intellect has no additional mission which would lead it beyond human life.”
The second would be ego. Have you ever noticed, about yourself or others, that people have this tendency to always place themselves in the picture. It’s as if they cannot comprehend of anything existing outside their perception. This alludes to our own individual biases and inclinations. “ And just as every porter wants to have an admirer, so even the proudest of men, the philosopher, supposes that he sees on all sides the eyes of the universe telescopically focused upon his thought and action.”
Nietzsche explains this way by calling this a survival trait as well. He means that we literally see what we want to see, or create our own worlds for the purpose of comfort ability. I on the other hand explain this way by simply erasing myself from the picture. I know it sounds impossible but a few years back I had a dream. In this dream I did not exist. In no way shape or form, on any plane of existence, was there ever a Jacob Clifton. It is definitely an experience to live a world without you in it. Ever since then I have had the unique ability to separate myself from the world around me and view all sides of things, people, and events without that voice inside that determines what you will see and think before you have even taken into account that fact that what you see might not be real.
Nietzsche also criticizes language. Now I do not attempt to get into a huge semantic argument, however Nietzsche dies raise an interesting question. “Is language the adequate expression of all realities?” This for one goes hand in hand with my experience above, but also peaks another interesting point. These things we call words are really just referents. That is the words we use are just sounds used to describe what something looks, feels, tastes, sounds, or smells LIKE. “Metaphors which correspond in no way to the original entities.” I suppose then that would be a suitable place to let you brain rest, after all is anything you’ve read really true, or are they useless symbols organized in such a manner that somehow derives meaning.
First lets look at the word Nonmoral so that we can determine just what Nietzsche is talking about. Nonmoral is classified by philosophers as being absent from moral behavior, that is to say they have no impact of acting in a good or in a less desirable way. That means that the kind of truth he is describing here is universal. It is accepted everywhere by everyone that has the ability to comprehend, and in fact is self-sufficient apart from mankind. Meaning oxygen is the same to fish who takes it from the water, as to a man who breathes it upon land. That is a universal truth.
Nietzsche is also questioning where the drive to find the truth came from. He brings this up because of two things.
One is Intellect. It is the tool given to us by nature to help us survive. Homonids are very fragile creatures with no sharp teeth, claws, or fangs to protect it. We have a brain that can comprehend, compute, and reason. That is our weapon in this world. “For this intellect has no additional mission which would lead it beyond human life.”
The second would be ego. Have you ever noticed, about yourself or others, that people have this tendency to always place themselves in the picture. It’s as if they cannot comprehend of anything existing outside their perception. This alludes to our own individual biases and inclinations. “ And just as every porter wants to have an admirer, so even the proudest of men, the philosopher, supposes that he sees on all sides the eyes of the universe telescopically focused upon his thought and action.”
Nietzsche explains this way by calling this a survival trait as well. He means that we literally see what we want to see, or create our own worlds for the purpose of comfort ability. I on the other hand explain this way by simply erasing myself from the picture. I know it sounds impossible but a few years back I had a dream. In this dream I did not exist. In no way shape or form, on any plane of existence, was there ever a Jacob Clifton. It is definitely an experience to live a world without you in it. Ever since then I have had the unique ability to separate myself from the world around me and view all sides of things, people, and events without that voice inside that determines what you will see and think before you have even taken into account that fact that what you see might not be real.
Nietzsche also criticizes language. Now I do not attempt to get into a huge semantic argument, however Nietzsche dies raise an interesting question. “Is language the adequate expression of all realities?” This for one goes hand in hand with my experience above, but also peaks another interesting point. These things we call words are really just referents. That is the words we use are just sounds used to describe what something looks, feels, tastes, sounds, or smells LIKE. “Metaphors which correspond in no way to the original entities.” I suppose then that would be a suitable place to let you brain rest, after all is anything you’ve read really true, or are they useless symbols organized in such a manner that somehow derives meaning.
Patrica Nelson Limerick
The first fundamental obstacle when trying to write about history is the fact that there is often so much information recounted by not one individual, but rather by many individuals. When you are dealing with more than one account of they way events have transpired then it becomes incredibly clear that many people see the same thing in different ways. This is especially true for me. Limerick uses the example of white man’s conquest over the Indians. That’s one is a pretty well known fact as we are all bombarded with this story from the time we are children, albeit we hear the lighter side; of how the Indians are our friends and we have never hurt them. I could talk about that, but I won’t. something more interesting happened to me over this thanksgiving weekend that I think illustrates the point just fine.
In 2006 I was working at a Wal-Mart when I was assaulted by a customer. Naturally I defended myself and struck the man back. The gentleman originally did not want to press charges, then surprisingly a month later I found that he was in fact pursuing criminal charges against me for battery. Of course I knew the truth and I couldn’t believe that I was being prosecuted. One year and 6 months later I am finally getting to trial to determine my innocence or guilt.
In the previous year his witness list was comprised of only himself and his wife of 38 years. Then the week of the trial, surprise! Two more witnesses show up that claim to have seen the whole event transpire and even tried to stop me from “beating” this helpless older gentleman. One by one the prosecution parades its case to the stand. One by one it becomes clear that not one person saw the event as it truly happened. They all placed themselves at the seen, but all of their actions did not coincide with the story of the older gentleman who was suing me.
Now of course it begs the question of truth, which I have something to say about in a later post concerning our good friend Nietzsche, however assuming that the witness were in fact telling the truth then why wouldn’t they have a story that matched the event? The two surprise witnesses could accurately describe the situation but neither one could “recall” accurately a scenario that would even be physically possible.
Of course this was plainly found out by the jury and I was found not guilty. (yes truth and justice do exist!) This event, which has been so long in coming, shows how many accounts of the same event can muddle the facts and often skewer a perspective to believe something that is not necessarily true. Remember that when you’re not sure you should believe what you see, read, hear, and most definitely with what you are told.
In 2006 I was working at a Wal-Mart when I was assaulted by a customer. Naturally I defended myself and struck the man back. The gentleman originally did not want to press charges, then surprisingly a month later I found that he was in fact pursuing criminal charges against me for battery. Of course I knew the truth and I couldn’t believe that I was being prosecuted. One year and 6 months later I am finally getting to trial to determine my innocence or guilt.
In the previous year his witness list was comprised of only himself and his wife of 38 years. Then the week of the trial, surprise! Two more witnesses show up that claim to have seen the whole event transpire and even tried to stop me from “beating” this helpless older gentleman. One by one the prosecution parades its case to the stand. One by one it becomes clear that not one person saw the event as it truly happened. They all placed themselves at the seen, but all of their actions did not coincide with the story of the older gentleman who was suing me.
Now of course it begs the question of truth, which I have something to say about in a later post concerning our good friend Nietzsche, however assuming that the witness were in fact telling the truth then why wouldn’t they have a story that matched the event? The two surprise witnesses could accurately describe the situation but neither one could “recall” accurately a scenario that would even be physically possible.
Of course this was plainly found out by the jury and I was found not guilty. (yes truth and justice do exist!) This event, which has been so long in coming, shows how many accounts of the same event can muddle the facts and often skewer a perspective to believe something that is not necessarily true. Remember that when you’re not sure you should believe what you see, read, hear, and most definitely with what you are told.
Thursday, October 4, 2007
Panopticism
In the essay, Panopticism, by Michel Focault, he makes the argument that we live in a society of surveillance. Meaning that our society is based on amalgamation of forces and bodies, all of which act to create the individual. It is this surveillance which forms the basis of power that draws the individual to believe that the world he lives in is one that is continually watching over him. Maybe. But this is America. I may have taken a backseat in many of America's internal issues, but this will not be one of them. We contunually struggle with this idea of "Big Brother" always watchig our every move, making sure that we fill the prescribed roles taught to us from birth. I have a real problem with that. I don't believe that it has to be true. I think that poeple make it true by being lazy about the world they live in. Since Americans strive for wealth more than happiness it is easy to see why the "big brother" idea was ingrained in us. People in America don't want to handle thier affiars so they pass the buck to the government they created only to be their VOICE. The liberty that has been paid for is misused and deluded, because people have lost the ability to speak for themselves. We have created a society that creats us. Everything around us tells us who we are and what we should be. I would hate to think of America as one big advertisement, but essentially thats what it is. Do this and you won't get in trouble, wear this and you'll belong here, be who you want just make sure that I (big brother) benefit from it.
Although these things are in my mind's eyes, I found it incredibly curious that Foucalt usues the black plague to illustrate his point. The balck plague, as you most likely already know, was no doubt the darkest hour of humanity caused by nature...with a little help from our four legged rodent friends! The plague effectively eliminated 1/3 of the population of Earth. That more than all the wars ever fought combined.
However Focault does not remind us of this, instead he uses these dark times to suit his purposes, and as well he should. For there is no time in human history where such total and complete order and compliance was ever to be achieved...not even here in our great America. In the very face of death the governments of the world needed to establish a quarantine of humanity as this was the only way to expose the disease vector, and to eliminate the possibilty of the disease spreading further. Citizens on the one hand, may or may not have liked being watched all the time, but deep down they recognized that it must be done or they would surely die.
Point being, that there was not one aspect of human activity that was not monitored and regulated. Now then that was a great need and is why we survived as a human race. However to carry that all the way over to America is pain insanity. Our "Big Brother" doesn't want to help us, he wants us turned into robots. Easy to handle human beings. It is our own fear that creates this, as in our constituiton we claim that the government is only the representative of the people...it's voice. Instead we have made it our master and we are it's slaves.
Although these things are in my mind's eyes, I found it incredibly curious that Foucalt usues the black plague to illustrate his point. The balck plague, as you most likely already know, was no doubt the darkest hour of humanity caused by nature...with a little help from our four legged rodent friends! The plague effectively eliminated 1/3 of the population of Earth. That more than all the wars ever fought combined.
However Focault does not remind us of this, instead he uses these dark times to suit his purposes, and as well he should. For there is no time in human history where such total and complete order and compliance was ever to be achieved...not even here in our great America. In the very face of death the governments of the world needed to establish a quarantine of humanity as this was the only way to expose the disease vector, and to eliminate the possibilty of the disease spreading further. Citizens on the one hand, may or may not have liked being watched all the time, but deep down they recognized that it must be done or they would surely die.
Point being, that there was not one aspect of human activity that was not monitored and regulated. Now then that was a great need and is why we survived as a human race. However to carry that all the way over to America is pain insanity. Our "Big Brother" doesn't want to help us, he wants us turned into robots. Easy to handle human beings. It is our own fear that creates this, as in our constituiton we claim that the government is only the representative of the people...it's voice. Instead we have made it our master and we are it's slaves.
Utopia Achieved
"lets all celebrate now. Americans have the proper theory/practice balance--not conceptualizing reality but realizing concepts..."
Do you agree? Yes I do. After reading Jean Baudrillards Utopia Achieved, I began to see America in a way that is not as apple pie as I have been culutred to think. It was a hard lump to digest to be sure, but one that has to be swallowed to move forward. (I know that totally makes sense right)
I began to see America as a whole entity rather than an enormous group of individuals...although this is America's greatest gift to begin with. The promise of freedom and individuality, one can choose to do or be anything, just as long as its the best mind you. This is just what Baudrillard is trying to illustrate. He is painting the picture of two worlds. One old and one new. The old is confined by it's own history in trying to realize the concepts that it has come to realize through centuries of trial and error. This other world is new, and not only has achieved many of these old concepts, but has surpassed them and now strives only to make it last indefinitely.
I like to think of America as an Idea machine. Constantly turning out, not new products, but dreams, hopes, and wishes. America is the land of oppurtunity because it is the land of want. It is a place where anyone can go to find what they are looking for. It is a place where everyone is bound by societies image rather than by society itself. A billboard along a highway says more to us than the daily newspaper calling to us about the distant affais of the old world and it's strife. America is competition. I want more than you.
Do you agree? Yes I do. After reading Jean Baudrillards Utopia Achieved, I began to see America in a way that is not as apple pie as I have been culutred to think. It was a hard lump to digest to be sure, but one that has to be swallowed to move forward. (I know that totally makes sense right)
I began to see America as a whole entity rather than an enormous group of individuals...although this is America's greatest gift to begin with. The promise of freedom and individuality, one can choose to do or be anything, just as long as its the best mind you. This is just what Baudrillard is trying to illustrate. He is painting the picture of two worlds. One old and one new. The old is confined by it's own history in trying to realize the concepts that it has come to realize through centuries of trial and error. This other world is new, and not only has achieved many of these old concepts, but has surpassed them and now strives only to make it last indefinitely.
I like to think of America as an Idea machine. Constantly turning out, not new products, but dreams, hopes, and wishes. America is the land of oppurtunity because it is the land of want. It is a place where anyone can go to find what they are looking for. It is a place where everyone is bound by societies image rather than by society itself. A billboard along a highway says more to us than the daily newspaper calling to us about the distant affais of the old world and it's strife. America is competition. I want more than you.
Thursday, September 20, 2007
Adrienne Rich
Men beware, she is hot to handle. But not without cause. I think That rich is a real writer. Now that is not to say that others aren’t, but Rich has gone through the correct thought process. She knows that it is beyond gender, Male or female, that it requires something else. That it must transcend normal thought. In this she is finding a power that women have for so long, in the writing world, been denied. I don’t see any reason why they should be excluded, for what human can do another can do, but hey I may be the only person who thinks that way!
There is something that she writes on page 546 that really snatched me, because it was the way I first began to think when I began writing…oh and to be sure I am NOT a female, so this only further proves that writing/communication is not unisex. “For about ten years I was reading in fierce snatches, scribbling in notebooks, writing poetry in fragments; I was looking for clues, because if there were no clues then I thought I might be insane.” Me too. Early in my life I came into a library of books. Among them were great authors like Herman Melville and Nathaniel Hawthorne, to whom I owe a great debt. However in the rush to experience what it felt to write I thought that I could find something in these books and authors that would help me in my own style. Wrong. Sure they all influenced me, but my style is born from my own soul and that is something I had to come to terms with, after thousands and thousands of crumpled papers!
I would also like to say something about Sources. One line in this entire thing encapsulates what I have been fighting myself. “I have resisted this for years, writing to you as if you could hear me.” I do not speak well verbally, and often times not even in writing, but somehow in writing I always manage to say something, or better yet to someone. All the things that I can’t articulate with the mouth I can sure as hell articulate with my pen. For years growing up I would write letters to my father asking him to get divorced, why did he put up with such abuse? I know it sounds crazy but if you care to comment, as I have only received two (and from the same person!) Maybe I’ll tell you a little about it.
There is something that she writes on page 546 that really snatched me, because it was the way I first began to think when I began writing…oh and to be sure I am NOT a female, so this only further proves that writing/communication is not unisex. “For about ten years I was reading in fierce snatches, scribbling in notebooks, writing poetry in fragments; I was looking for clues, because if there were no clues then I thought I might be insane.” Me too. Early in my life I came into a library of books. Among them were great authors like Herman Melville and Nathaniel Hawthorne, to whom I owe a great debt. However in the rush to experience what it felt to write I thought that I could find something in these books and authors that would help me in my own style. Wrong. Sure they all influenced me, but my style is born from my own soul and that is something I had to come to terms with, after thousands and thousands of crumpled papers!
I would also like to say something about Sources. One line in this entire thing encapsulates what I have been fighting myself. “I have resisted this for years, writing to you as if you could hear me.” I do not speak well verbally, and often times not even in writing, but somehow in writing I always manage to say something, or better yet to someone. All the things that I can’t articulate with the mouth I can sure as hell articulate with my pen. For years growing up I would write letters to my father asking him to get divorced, why did he put up with such abuse? I know it sounds crazy but if you care to comment, as I have only received two (and from the same person!) Maybe I’ll tell you a little about it.
Harriet Jacobs
I wish I was more competent for the task I have undertaken…that’s what keeps popping into my mind as I read Incidents in the Life of a Slave Girl. I think it’s possible that she has been through so much, as is apparent in the story, that she doesn’t even know how talented she is.
There are a few things I would like to say . One is I may not have been a slave, but I do know exactly what it is like to be controlled by another’s will. Not to have thought nor breath that is my own. I was mastered by my stepmother in a most psychological way. There was no help from my father “They were the objects of her constant suspicion and malevolence. She watched her husband with unceasing vigilance; but he was well practiced in the means to evade it.” That perfectly describes my own father. He spoke little and did all he could to avoid my step mom.
How can there be so much evil in this world.? Jacobs cries out, in all modesty “IN the view of these things, why are ye silent, ye free men and women of the north? Why do your tongues falter in maintenance of the right? Would that I had more ability! But my heart is so full, and my pen so weak!” That’s an amazing quote to me because it still rings true today. Because people are uninformed and so no desire to be informed, never will they know of the horrors that still exist within the hearts of evil men today.
Bottom line is that I appreciated Harriet Jacobs view of slavery a little more than James Baldwin. It is more human. Jacobs writes from her experience . I like that because I like to see the truth in all things. I do not like things sugar coated, I don’t like things to be alluded to, and I really don’t like it when an author doesn’t allow me to feel what the author felt. I feel bad because I am supposed to. This is something I am sorry ever happened to anyone and I will do all in my power to prevent from ever happening again. That I believe is the point…to learn one’s lesson.
There are a few things I would like to say . One is I may not have been a slave, but I do know exactly what it is like to be controlled by another’s will. Not to have thought nor breath that is my own. I was mastered by my stepmother in a most psychological way. There was no help from my father “They were the objects of her constant suspicion and malevolence. She watched her husband with unceasing vigilance; but he was well practiced in the means to evade it.” That perfectly describes my own father. He spoke little and did all he could to avoid my step mom.
How can there be so much evil in this world.? Jacobs cries out, in all modesty “IN the view of these things, why are ye silent, ye free men and women of the north? Why do your tongues falter in maintenance of the right? Would that I had more ability! But my heart is so full, and my pen so weak!” That’s an amazing quote to me because it still rings true today. Because people are uninformed and so no desire to be informed, never will they know of the horrors that still exist within the hearts of evil men today.
Bottom line is that I appreciated Harriet Jacobs view of slavery a little more than James Baldwin. It is more human. Jacobs writes from her experience . I like that because I like to see the truth in all things. I do not like things sugar coated, I don’t like things to be alluded to, and I really don’t like it when an author doesn’t allow me to feel what the author felt. I feel bad because I am supposed to. This is something I am sorry ever happened to anyone and I will do all in my power to prevent from ever happening again. That I believe is the point…to learn one’s lesson.
Thursday, September 13, 2007
Houdini's Box
Seeing isn’t believing. I’ve always believed this philosophy, and I have also always been a fan of Houdini. I first saw the Metamorphosis performed while I was in grade school. The Boise Little Theatre had come to my school performing a play about the great Harry Houdini. I was amazed and astonished that such a feat could be accomplished. After reading this essay I felt amazed and astonished all over again like I was in grade school all over again. The concept of escape comes up continually. Escape from ourselves and the world around us and all that it entails. Personally I believe this whole heartedly. Everyone needs a little escape know and then. Places things into perspective. The problem is, where is there to escape to? Can one really hide from everything? What do you think Houdini would have said. He would have said something along the line of my own personal philosophy. Impossible only means just hasn’t happened yet.
Alice Walker
I am not Black. I am most certainly not a woman…but my heart is still broken. I cannot even begin to describe the feeling of the knife as it plunges into my heart. I cannot begin to number the sins that leak from the wounds it creates. They are not only mine, but are shared with generations of men and women. Their trespasses are mine because I refuse to forget them. I shoulder the weight of the damage they have caused because I will not forget those who have suffered. They did not suffer by my hand, but they might as well have. I can see it in the eyes of their ancestors. The pain that is written upon their souls that they cannot explain because they can’t forget it either. I don’t know how to tell them I’m sorry without sounding condescending or presumptuous. I don’t know how to tell them that there is a thing called love. There is a love that goes beyond a man and a woman…even beyond God. It is nothing that could ever be expressed with words. It can only be experienced when it is felt. So overpowering that it feels as if you are only a child again, fresh from the womb, and free of all evil that was bestowed upon you by the actions of those that came before you. I am not Black. I am not a woman…but my heart is still broken.
richard Rodriguez
I like this one a lot…a lot! Rodriguez writes from a very human perspective, and I see a lot of myself in the story of his education. I think it’s a theme that’s developing in me. First it was Henry Adams, and now a more contemporary author Richard Rodriguez.
Rodriguez talks about how, over the years, his education increasingly distanced himself from his family and from that of those around him. He felt alone. That is entirely how I first felt when I began to read everything in my sight. He also talks about how there seemed an enmity between him and fellow students. People like us are considered suck ups or brown nosers. Really people just don’t like being outclassed. Although I will be the first to admit that that is far from the truth, and takes a high level of ignorance to believe. It is only human to feel like someone thinks themselves better because they are “smarter.” Everyone has something to offer whether you’re a paint mixer or the president. I think it is this above all that I have taken from my reading. There is value in almost everything we do, and knowledge is not to be coveted…it is to be shared. Anyways I have rambled on long enough as this is only the surface of what I am really feeling, and would take me damn near 1000 pages to express…if I’m lucky.
Rodriguez talks about how, over the years, his education increasingly distanced himself from his family and from that of those around him. He felt alone. That is entirely how I first felt when I began to read everything in my sight. He also talks about how there seemed an enmity between him and fellow students. People like us are considered suck ups or brown nosers. Really people just don’t like being outclassed. Although I will be the first to admit that that is far from the truth, and takes a high level of ignorance to believe. It is only human to feel like someone thinks themselves better because they are “smarter.” Everyone has something to offer whether you’re a paint mixer or the president. I think it is this above all that I have taken from my reading. There is value in almost everything we do, and knowledge is not to be coveted…it is to be shared. Anyways I have rambled on long enough as this is only the surface of what I am really feeling, and would take me damn near 1000 pages to express…if I’m lucky.
Deep Play
Wow, I have to admit that even for me this was a slow read. That aside I would like to point out a couple of things that I found really interesting. I was completely amazed at the sheer weight that the Balinese people place on these cockfights without really placing any weight on them. I know it sounds weird but please bear with me.
It becomes clear that the cocks are a representation of their owners. Everything that the owner sees in himself, he will try to culture in his bird. His honor, his dignity, and even his social status. It’s interesting to me that theses cockfights are like wars in other countries. They ally some and destroy others, yet the only blood shed is that of the chicken. Please don’t get me wrong, ALL life should be cherished and protected. But remember one thing. Violence is a part of nature that is inescapable. To eat and to survive, one (man or animal) must kill.
Thursday, September 6, 2007
James Baldwin
Stranger in The Village
Time and time again I am constantly suprised by man's shining acomplishments, but also of thiers outrageous shortcomings. James Baldwin writes the perspectives of whites on Blacks in America versus those abroad. When James Baldwin visits the villag, the people there are taken with a kind of wonder but not somethign that can be contrued as being racist. He is confronted with the stark contrast of belief with that of his native home in America. He realizes that people can see the same thngs different ways. For hundreds if years in America the balck man was not even really considered human, but a piece of property. Only now in these modern times is this very same sentiment, not always the same but a constantly changing prejudice, staring to ebb and die. Baldwin writes " It is only now beginning ti be borne in in us-very faintly, it must be admitted, very slowly, and very much against out will-that this vision of the world is dangerously inaccurate, and perfectly useless. For it protects our moral highmindedness at the terrible expense of weakening our grasp on reality. People who shut thier eyes to reality simply invite thier own destruction, and anyone who insists on remaining in a state of innoconce long after that innocence is dead turns himself into a monster."
Chew on that for awhile...
Time and time again I am constantly suprised by man's shining acomplishments, but also of thiers outrageous shortcomings. James Baldwin writes the perspectives of whites on Blacks in America versus those abroad. When James Baldwin visits the villag, the people there are taken with a kind of wonder but not somethign that can be contrued as being racist. He is confronted with the stark contrast of belief with that of his native home in America. He realizes that people can see the same thngs different ways. For hundreds if years in America the balck man was not even really considered human, but a piece of property. Only now in these modern times is this very same sentiment, not always the same but a constantly changing prejudice, staring to ebb and die. Baldwin writes " It is only now beginning ti be borne in in us-very faintly, it must be admitted, very slowly, and very much against out will-that this vision of the world is dangerously inaccurate, and perfectly useless. For it protects our moral highmindedness at the terrible expense of weakening our grasp on reality. People who shut thier eyes to reality simply invite thier own destruction, and anyone who insists on remaining in a state of innoconce long after that innocence is dead turns himself into a monster."
Chew on that for awhile...
Gloria Anzaldua
Entering the Serpent
This one was a little bit of a surprise. I have to admit that I wasn’t really prepared for the twists and turns Gloria Anzaldua takes in her writing. I really felt like the beginning of this reading was rather tedious and I constantly felt like a weight was pulling me down further and further into the depths as I read. The History of her people was interesting and deserves the attention she gives it, but I could barely hang on. Until I came to the end and realized she wasn’t talking just about her history, but rather her belief. Gloria has a great perception of the “Spirit World.” When she began to write about our ability to perceive this world in everything, but we continually tell ourselves otherwise because of the society we live in, that teaches us that such things cannot possibly exist. I can attest to, in my own life, something similar. There’s a feeling you get when you know you’re connecting to something outside yourself, and I refuse to ignore that. There is something more than this mundane ,working-world mentality. I have a human brain and with that impossible only means just hasn’t happened yet.
How to Tame a wild Tongue
I felt lost. Like I couldn’t identify. Then I thought, am I supposed to feel this way? Gloria Anzaldua writes in such a way that really paints the picture of what she is trying to say. You can really feel what it’s like to be so different that even the closest ones around you can still make you feel like an alien. It breaks my heart to read that she was punished for speaking her own language. It makes me ashamed that my own people would be so narrow minded as to forget the beauty of culture. I think we as humans have a responsibility not to just humanity, but to ourselves. We need to realize that there is not one way to approach things, but many way in which to see something. Your perception can change if you step outside yourself and dare to see the things you fear.
This one was a little bit of a surprise. I have to admit that I wasn’t really prepared for the twists and turns Gloria Anzaldua takes in her writing. I really felt like the beginning of this reading was rather tedious and I constantly felt like a weight was pulling me down further and further into the depths as I read. The History of her people was interesting and deserves the attention she gives it, but I could barely hang on. Until I came to the end and realized she wasn’t talking just about her history, but rather her belief. Gloria has a great perception of the “Spirit World.” When she began to write about our ability to perceive this world in everything, but we continually tell ourselves otherwise because of the society we live in, that teaches us that such things cannot possibly exist. I can attest to, in my own life, something similar. There’s a feeling you get when you know you’re connecting to something outside yourself, and I refuse to ignore that. There is something more than this mundane ,working-world mentality. I have a human brain and with that impossible only means just hasn’t happened yet.
How to Tame a wild Tongue
I felt lost. Like I couldn’t identify. Then I thought, am I supposed to feel this way? Gloria Anzaldua writes in such a way that really paints the picture of what she is trying to say. You can really feel what it’s like to be so different that even the closest ones around you can still make you feel like an alien. It breaks my heart to read that she was punished for speaking her own language. It makes me ashamed that my own people would be so narrow minded as to forget the beauty of culture. I think we as humans have a responsibility not to just humanity, but to ourselves. We need to realize that there is not one way to approach things, but many way in which to see something. Your perception can change if you step outside yourself and dare to see the things you fear.
Henry Adams
The Education of Henry Adams
Where do I begin? That’s a good question, and one worth answering after reading the Education Of Henry Adams. I was both stunned and delighted to find that there are many parallels between myself and the young Adams. We both realize that education, knowledge, learning, or whatever you would like to call it means nothing without desire. We both live in times where it seems students are mass produced to try and fit with the changing ideologies of efficiency and continuity. And we both hold a deep respect for women, while at the same time acknowledging the fact that they are still full of…it.
Something I read in this essay that hooked me like a fish, came when Adams began to distinguish himself form the average student. Henry Adams writes “ He regarded himself as the only person for whom his education had value, and he wanted the whole of it.” I could feel something inside bubbling to the surface as soon as I read that passage. It was some connection I was making. I was connecting two different worlds and two different times by the fact that I felt the very same way as Henry Adams describes himself during his Harvard years. Henry Adams uses the word “Self-possessed” He writes rather eloquently what we would today just as soon say “DUH”
Something else I would like to mention from the Harvard days of young Adams. This springs back to what I said earlier about students being mast produced. If we consider the time gap we find that we are experiencing very nearly the same situation as young Adams is living through. Think about it…Most of us were born in the Twentieth century, have seen the Twenty first century, and are continually lost in the struggle to keep up with new technologies and systems that born, and digitally born constantly. There is a great desire for well greased cogs to operate these new systems and thus the emphasis on learning is placed on complacency rather than on knowledge.
I really don’t want to talk about women, but I must. Today’s woman is a very different creature than today’s man. Women have achieved the recognition of their power, as opposed to the pursuit of that recognition during the life of Henry Adams. Today’s woman is an individual staying afloat by her own will and power and not by that of any other man…or woman! Today’s woman doesn’t like her hand held, and will expose you to the very core if you should cross her. Of course this only applies to my experiences with American women in a limited time frame of twenty two years.
Also, it wouldn’t kill you to respond to this and give me reasons why any of this is B.S.
Where do I begin? That’s a good question, and one worth answering after reading the Education Of Henry Adams. I was both stunned and delighted to find that there are many parallels between myself and the young Adams. We both realize that education, knowledge, learning, or whatever you would like to call it means nothing without desire. We both live in times where it seems students are mass produced to try and fit with the changing ideologies of efficiency and continuity. And we both hold a deep respect for women, while at the same time acknowledging the fact that they are still full of…it.
Something I read in this essay that hooked me like a fish, came when Adams began to distinguish himself form the average student. Henry Adams writes “ He regarded himself as the only person for whom his education had value, and he wanted the whole of it.” I could feel something inside bubbling to the surface as soon as I read that passage. It was some connection I was making. I was connecting two different worlds and two different times by the fact that I felt the very same way as Henry Adams describes himself during his Harvard years. Henry Adams uses the word “Self-possessed” He writes rather eloquently what we would today just as soon say “DUH”
Something else I would like to mention from the Harvard days of young Adams. This springs back to what I said earlier about students being mast produced. If we consider the time gap we find that we are experiencing very nearly the same situation as young Adams is living through. Think about it…Most of us were born in the Twentieth century, have seen the Twenty first century, and are continually lost in the struggle to keep up with new technologies and systems that born, and digitally born constantly. There is a great desire for well greased cogs to operate these new systems and thus the emphasis on learning is placed on complacency rather than on knowledge.
I really don’t want to talk about women, but I must. Today’s woman is a very different creature than today’s man. Women have achieved the recognition of their power, as opposed to the pursuit of that recognition during the life of Henry Adams. Today’s woman is an individual staying afloat by her own will and power and not by that of any other man…or woman! Today’s woman doesn’t like her hand held, and will expose you to the very core if you should cross her. Of course this only applies to my experiences with American women in a limited time frame of twenty two years.
Also, it wouldn’t kill you to respond to this and give me reasons why any of this is B.S.
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